My Vegan Journey
I suppose my journey to veganism began Spring 2014, during my freshman year of college. I was sitting at a table outside my dining hall when I overheard a girl at my table say “I’m thinking of becoming vegan.” Her announcement was met with confusion and shocked faces (mine included). “I just love animals,” she said. I felt surprised and a little bit attacked by her motive. I love animals too, I thought, but vegan? That sounds a little extreme. I looked down at my plate, which was probably filled with cheese pizza, some salad with ranch dressing, and maybe some cookies. I couldn’t imagine a meal that didn’t have animal ingredients in it. The subject quickly changed, but I couldn’t shake the idea of veganism from my head.
To give you some background on just where I was in my food journey, we’ll have to rewind a bit. Growing up, I ate a diet that I’d consider slightly healthier than the standard American diet. We never had sugary cereal, soda, or super junky snacks and the majority of our meals were home cooked (thanks mom). But we still ate our fair share of deli meat and cheese sandwiches, almost always had milk with dinner, and always had ice cream in the freezer. I can recall coming home from school and snacking on nachos and ice cream before going to gymnastics practice (my stomach churns thinking about that now). I topped every meal with cheese and I was obsessed with bacon. I am not exaggerating. People gifted me clothing and decor with bacon on it. That’s how crazy about bacon I was. Eating animals was never something I gave a second thought. I tried going vegetarian just for the fun of it in middle school one or two times and I think I lasted about a month.
My whole family was always very active (I was a gymnast up until I graduated high school) and we are all naturally small. Because of that, I always felt like I could eat whatever I wanted with no consequences. Once I started college, all of that changed. I was rudely awakened to the salty, fatty, battered and fried smorgasboard that was the dining hall. I was also eating a lot more junk-foody snacks with my friends and drinking too much on the weekends. I basically continued life as I had been–eating whatever I wanted and exercising regularly–but like many freshmen, my body rejected my new lifestyle. I was perpetually bloated, sluggish, and very self conscious about my changing body.
I desperately wanted to make a change, but didn’t know what to do. I started eating what I thought was healthy (a lot of salad and not enough calories), which only led to late night binging and feelings of guilt. Meanwhile, my obsession with becoming healthy was wreaking havoc on my body image and mental health. Food became the number one thing on my mind, but I wasn’t making any progress in the right direction.
When I heard about veganism, I thought it would be a quick and easy solution. I would try to be completely vegan a couple of days a week, but my diet consisted mostly of granola bars, salads, rice, and other low nutrition foods. I would be so hungry by the end of the day that I would use the next day just to stock back up on the calories I was missing. I felt like a failure for “cheating,” but what I didn’t realize was that my diet was majorly lacking in calories and nutrients.
At last, my final days at the dining hall had come and gone. That summer, I got more of a grip on plant-based eating. I gave up a lot of processed snacks that I used to eat, realizing that they were usually full of animal products. I greatly reduced my meat intake after reading a book called Full Planet Empty Plates, which discussed food scarcity and the resources used to produce meat. I also discovered the documentary Forks Over Knives, which taught me about the health benefits of ditching animal products. I started eating more legumes, nuts, seeds, healthy grains, and fats, which helped balance out my diet, but I still lacked the motivation to give up meat and dairy completely.
That fall, I lived in an apartment with a kitchen. It was the first time I could decide exactly what I did and did not want to fuel my body with. I stopped eating meat at home because I thought it was gross to buy raw meat and prepare it myself. I started eating a predominantly plant-based diet at home, but if I went out to eat, I was basically pescatarian. For some reason, I was ashamed to be “restricting” myself. I was worried that people would think I was obsessive about food or that I was uncool because I wouldn’t eat pizza or ice cream. But for the first time, I was learning to listen to my body and observe how animal products negatively affected my mood and energy levels. Every time I ordered a seafood dish or a baked good, I felt a twinge of guilt knowing I was making a decision that didn’t truly align with my goals.
Finally, one night, I watched the documentary Earthlings, which depicts the horrors that occur in slaughterhouses and factory farms. By the end of the movie, I was in tears. I knew I could no longer support these industries. I announced to my friends the next day that I was going to try to go vegan. I explained how upset I was by what I had just seen and that I couldn’t feel good about continuing to buy animal products. I think they thought I was a little crazy. But learning how the meat, dairy, and egg industries exploit animals finally motivated me to make a change. I wish I could say I quit animal products cold turkey (no pun intended), but it took me a couple of months to stop completely and many more months to figure out how to eat properly as a vegan. I remember my first vegan Thanksgiving that year as a freshly converted vegan (I probably only ate mashed potatoes and cranberry sauce that year. I don’t let that happen anymore ;) ).
When I first went vegan, I felt really alienated. I didn’t know any other vegans. I didn’t know where to go for resources. I didn’t know what a balanced, plant-based diet looked like. I learned a lot through trial and error…and the internet. I felt very insecure about my diet choice too. Fearing judgment and concern, I didn’t tell anyone except my closest friends that I was vegan; I didn’t actually call myself vegan for about a year. But with time, I became much more comfortable with my decision. I met like-minded people at my college. I found instagrammers and celebrities who were vegan. I even watched some of my friends and family go vegan. Vegan cheese showed up at the store and yogurt and meat and ice cream and a vegan restaurant opened down the street. Now, eating a plant-based diet feels like the most normal and natural thing in the world. I once thought veganism sounded so restrictive, but it has actually been the most liberating choice for me. I still eat whatever I want, I just no longer want to eat animals; I want to eat real food that makes my body feel good.
I get emotional thinking about my vegan journey and wondering where I would be if it weren’t for veganism. Changing my diet changed my entire mindset and life. Becoming vegan instilled compassion in me, where I really was lacking before. It also led me to care about environmental issues, human rights issues, public health issues, and so much more. It led me to people who I may never have talked to otherwise, who inspired me and helped me grow in so many ways. It shook up my world and I am endlessly grateful for that. I hope that by sharing my story, I can show people that anyone can make a change. I was not always health conscious and my dietary choices didn’t always align with my values. I hope that I can help support those who may want to transition to a vegan diet and alleviate some of the confusion and stress that a major lifestyle change can bring.